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Do you remember your first group networking opportunity? At what early age did you experience a coordinated event? For my generation it was about five years of age. Most baby boomers didn’t have the opportunity to attend Pre-School and only the wealthy kids went to nursery school, so kindergarten turned out to be our first group happening. Yes, in those early years when the teacher would make us form a circle and put on a song, we had no idea of the lesson we were about to learn. The Hokey Pokey was the song; boys hated it and the girls loved it. You know men are always behind women when it comes to realizing the lessons of life. As the music played we were taught a progressive pattern of dance movements, thrusting in rhythm various extremities as we leaned into a circle and the songs lyrics instructed us what to do next. At five years of age we laughed and had fun not realizing the song would haunt us forever. Yes, here we are in the new millennium talking about networking and the Hokey Pokey ~ you see nothing has changed.
You know the words, don’t be shy ~ sing along. You put your right hand in, take your right hand out, put your right hand in and shake it all about. You do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around, that’s what it’s all about.
Yes I know, now you hate me because you’ll be humming these lyrics all day long.
As you hum ask yourself this question, what did a children’s song taught us about business networking?
Well, first of all at this early age we learned how important it is to start the networking dance of life by extending the right hand. It is the first thing we do when we meet someone. The universal greeting is shaking right hands. Amazing how these things work out.
As the lyrics progress you’ll remember, other parts of the body are added to the mix until you eventually give yourself totally to your group. Dancing, smiling, shaking hands and heads all building up to the big crescendo of putting your whole self in. The big finale is jumping forward and realizing you are completely involved ~ you put your whole self in. Do you remember how that felt as you took this leap of fate? It was fun and you were excited to be a part of the group.
When you go to your next networking event and shake the right hands of the members, think about how much of yourself you have put into the network dance. Yes, you have a firm hand shake; you have put your head into the circle offering ideas trying to convey the big message about your business. You may have even shaken a hip or two in an effort to make a point. Surprise, you are doing the networking dance. The one you learned at five years of age.
As the music plays and you do the dance pause for a moment and ask yourself the big question, "are you in time with the group." Have you really put your whole self in? Have you made the effort to learn about all of the members in the network group, or do you only dance with a few select partners? Have you kept in rhythm with the group? Have you been enthusiastic and supportive while joining in the dance? Do you really know how to dance?
If the answer is not yes to all of those questions, then you really are faking it. You are not dancing you are just shaking your booty on the side of the dance floor. In fact you have two left feet. You are not in time with your group; you are not really "in" the circle because they can’t trust you to perform in concert with the others.
Yes, even at five years of age, we looked around that circle of friends to see who we can trust to participate in the dance. Who is having fun and secure enough to put their whole self in? Even then we were aware of those participating in the dance of life and how good of a cohort they made.
Well nothing has changed since you were five. Maybe the age of your associates has changed but the circle of influence is the same. Your group is looking to see who is willing to participate and who can be trusted to keep in rhythm with the song. Who is putting their whole self in?
So the next time you are at a networking event, shaking hands and smiling, think back to when you were five years old and put your whole self in ~ that’s what it’s all about! J
Robert Putt is Executive Director of the American Business Associates New Jersey Chapter. The ABA-NJ is a business development association that meets monthly. Robert is also a published restaurant critic for Times-Ledger Newsgroup, N.Y. and President, RSP Associates hotel and restaurant consulting firm and contributing writer to Pros4Pros website. Individuals seeking more information about the ABA New Jersey may contact Robert at RSPutt@Verizon.net. |
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